Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
love makes seman taste better
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
Randomize
