Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
