i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
Randomize
