Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
Randomize
