How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
Note to all middle aged "I totally let myself go after childbirth" frumpy mothers: I do not dress this way for your husbands. Stop looking at me like that. It's not my fault.
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
The convent might be a nice break from real life
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
Randomize
