By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Randomize
