We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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