Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
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