smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
Randomize
