Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
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