Christians are straight up FREAKS
that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
