My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
I have been standing totally still for the past 6 minutes because I was convinced my foot was tied to the ground. It turns out it was a string of hair strewn across my foot
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
Randomize
