I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
Randomize
