Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Randomize