At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
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