Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
Randomize
