if you like me you must not know who I am
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
Randomize
