it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
Randomize
