Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
Don't make this awkward for me. Don't let your mom come near the bathroom. I can't meet your mom for the first time while I'm shitting. Dont make this awkward.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
