I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
Randomize