My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
Hello my rib-scented angel!
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
Randomize
