Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
Randomize
