Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
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