he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
Randomize
