a queef is a wish your heart makes.
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Randomize
