so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
Nearly got hit by a blue bell ice cream truck. Can I count on you to make plenty of puns like "her life was sweet, and so was her death" at my funeral if that was to happen?
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
Randomize
