haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
Randomize
