nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
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