Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Randomize