Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
You took all of my sister's dolls and threw them out the window and then you started talking to her etcha sketch and mr. potato head. I later found you passed out in front of Toy Story and it all made sense.
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
Randomize
