Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
