Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
