at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
What a fucking waste of an outfit
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
Randomize