i would punch a child for taco bell
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
Yeah everywhere i go i feel like a 3rd or 5th or (2n+1)th wheel. That's right, i'm a mathematically depressed drunk.
Randomize
