Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
Randomize
