sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
Randomize
