You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize