He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
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