But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
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