Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Randomize