careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
Where is the baby squirrel I found last night?! I've looked all morning I can't find Morris anywhere did someone take him?? ðŸ˜ðŸ˜
Honey, I kept trying to tell you it was just a pine cone.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
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