Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
I was looking through my facebook friends list to see how many ppl on the list i've hooked up with, and was effectively reminded of my failed friendships, relationships, fuck budy-ships, friends with benefits, and "i cant remember if i ever did shit with him but we're awkward now" ships.
zippers are such a cool invention
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
Randomize
