He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
YAS. BRING CRAB.
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