Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
Randomize