Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
Passed out watching pirates of caribbean with vodka in hand. Woke up to jenna jameson, with vodka gone.
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
Randomize
