what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
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