i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
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