I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
I'm way too hungover for life right now
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
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