Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
Randomize