did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
I take back everything I said about communal showers
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
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